By now, if you watched or even simply knew that Comedy Central hosted a roast for Rob Lowe, you know that Ann Coulter was the real star of the show. As soon as the event kicked off, audience members were live-tweeting the hate she was receiving from the other comedians and celebrities on the dais, and we also offered a firsthand account of the polemicists demise. Of course, what we call a demise or verbal obliteration, Coulter called a victory. And rightfully so, because everyone was talking about her for an entire week while she was pushing her latest book to Trump-loving Americans.
On Monday night, we got to see all of the Coulter jokes that were good enough to be included in the TV broadcast. Coulter wasnt lying when she called it the Roast of Ann Coulter featuring Rob Lowe, because there were far more jokes about her than there were about what we expected to be the easiest target: Lowes 1988 sex tape scandal. Why was Coulter even there? Buy my book! Buy my book! But how did the woman who proclaimed herself the champion of the evening actually handle the barrage of insults?
Lets take an in-depth look at her actual reaction to each performers attempts to shame her. First up, the Roast Master got the ball rolling:
Is Pete white? Is he black? Ann Coulter needs to know so she can decide if she hates him. David Spade
Ann Coulter, if youre here, whos scaring the crows away from our crops? Ann describes herself as a polemicist, but most people call her a c*nt. Last year, we had Martha Stewart, who sells sheets. Now we have Ann Coulter, who cuts eyeholes in them. Pete Davidson
Holy shit, is that Ann Coulter? That can mean only one thing: someone must have said her name three times! Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice! Fun fact: Ann Coulter has a big, angry bush. No joke, thats just a fun fact. Rob Riggle
As a feminist, I cant support everything being said up here tonight. As somebody who hates Ann Coulter, Im delighted. Jeff Ross is going to party like its 1999. Ann Coulter is going to vote like its 1899. Ann, you do look great, though. Youre almost as thin as Donald Trumps chances of winning the election. Its really a small world. Last week I was behind Ann Coulter in line at Chipotle, and she ordered something to go: the entire kitchen staff. Whats weird is, believe it or not, gay men love Ann Coulter. Its because two seconds into hearing her speak, they remember why they hate pussy. Jewel
Ann Coulter, here we go Ann Coulter is one of the most repugnant, hateful, hatchet-faced bitches alive. But its not too late to change, Ann. You could kill yourself. Ann Coulter looks so much like a truck stop transvestite whore that I saw Jeff Ross run to an ATM just before the show. Ann Coulters pussy is so old and dry that it just got a job drawing cartoons for The New Yorker. Jimmy Carr
As we all know, Im not the only athlete here tonight. Earlier this year, Ann Coulter won the Kentucky Derby. Peyton Manning
Without fhrer ado, Ann Coulter! Whats it like to be a real-life supervillain? Id ask you how you sleep at night, but I assume its upside-down in a robe made of 101 dalmatians. Ann Coulter has written 11 books, 12 if you count Mein Kampf. Anns been called a racist, anti-Semitic, homophobic, a white supremacist, and thats just while getting plowed by Bill Maher. The only person you will ever make happy is the Mexican who digs your grave. Nikki Glaser
Ann Coulter, Im glad to see you here. I respect you. Youre the one female commentator who is not afraid to stand up to take a leak. Ralph Macchio
Ann, you have a face that can make doves cry! How do you roast someone from hell? That face. That voice. Its like fingernails on a chalkboard inside an inner-city school you want to defund. Anns against gay marriage. Whats your thinking on that? If I cant get a husband, they shouldnt either? Jeff Ross
Its 56 days til Halloween, but I see that Ann Coulter is already in her skeleton costume. People ask, why is Ann Coulter here tonight? The answer: because the right-to-lifers wanted everyone to see what an abortion looks like up close. You know, Ann, after seeing your set tonight, I think we all witnessed the first bombing that you cant blame on a Muslim. Rob Lowe
Not to take sides, but Im starting to think Coulter was on to something when she said some of these comics werent telling actual jokes. But at the very least, the woman selling a book seemed to handle the obliteration with a smile.
Continued here:
How Did Ann Coulter Actually Handle The Rob Lowe Roast Jokes?