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Hello again, gentle readers, and welcome back to another riveting episode of Am I the Literary Asshole?, the advice column thats interested in having a little cheese with that whine. Once again, Im traveling as I answer your most pressing questionsthis week to attend the Lambda Literary Awards in New York City! Thats right, they occasionally let me leave the state of Florida (but only for like one weekend at a timeI am the swamps gay ambassador, after all). Excited to report that they have beer here in New York, too. Fingers crossed I manage to roll into a 7-Eleven at some point tonight!

Theres a lot to see and a lot to do (and a lot to drink), so lets get this show on the road. Its Pride again, baby! Cheers from this Top, and Bottoms up!

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1) My booksta is basically to gather an audience for when my book (whenever that may be) will be done. (I KNOW, Im already an assh*le). Anyway, I want to share my honest opinions about what Im reading, but Im worried if Im being negative about an authors work that it will bite me in the butt down the road. I also dont want to be entirely vanilla and claim everything is great. I also fully understand not everything is for everybody. So I feel like my reviews are turning out to be half hearted and stale. I want people to trust me but I tend to be on the critical side. WHAT TO DO?!?!

This is a particularly fascinating question because from the first sentence youve proudly proclaimed yourself the asshole! So thats one piece of advice I dont have to dole out this round, thank you for making my job easier, friend.

Im joking, of course. Im very much of the opinion that we all act like assholes every once in a while (myself very much included). Thats the reason I wanted to write this damn advice column in the first place! Well, that and the excuse to day-drink. Let he who is without mess cast the first stone when it comes to judging bad bookish behavior. If you know that youre the kind of person who can come across as a little abrasive and youre worried that your honest reviews might impact your own work down the road, I think thats a fair concern.

Will writing negatively about other artists work impact how people treat yours in the future? Friend, its completely possible. If you know that you lean toward the critical in your reviews, understand that people might read that criticism as unfair or overly harmful. They might take offense and very much remember that hurt and anger when your work eventually gets published. Much like those writers youre reviewing cant control how you write about their work, know that you cant control how people choose to take your reviews. Insert that meme here about excitedly reaping only to wake up the next day and realize you have also sown something terribly unwanted. It might help matters if you dont tag the author in anything thats going to be overly critical, but at the end of the day, you cant really control that, either. Its the internet, its everywhere.

I guess the question essentially boils down to a fairly simple one: do you care more about writing honest reviews or are you more concerned with it coming back to haunt you? Once you make that choice, then everything will get a lot easier. Maybe not nicer, but a little simpler.

Lets select another question from the grab bag as I slip into another beer.

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2) A friend of mine runs a small business and she is using ChatGPT to write her marketing newsletters. Kristen, the writing is not good. As a writer, Im appalled by how bad it is. Am I overstepping if I tell her this? Im worried shell be offended even though technically Im insulting an LLLM, not her.

The thing about AI writing all of this stuff recently is that writers can usually recognize when someone is using it. The reason for that? Its pretty bad.

I dont think your friend would be shocked to learn that her marketing newsletters arent reading as beautifully as a poem. I do think that she might be upset if you were the one who decided to point that fact out to her. The program might be technically creating the content, but shes the one whos collecting it and stuffing it into her newsletters. Shes seen it and thought, yes, this is what I will use.

If thats the case, then some part of her probably likes it and (*gulp*) thinks its good. This is her business, not just a hobby, and in all likelihood she takes it seriously. Butting into her work life when it doesnt have anything to do with your friendship might derail your good vibes altogether. Just saying.

However, if you wanted to approach this in a different way, I think its possible to get to the heart of the problem without telling your friend that her work straight up sucks. Youre a writerhave a conversation with this friend about AI and how it affects your own work. Talk with them about the ways that its harmful; how it steals from us. You can also talk about how its not very good at stealing, either. Maybe shell make the connection, maybe she wont. But at least youll have put it out there.

One more question and then Ive gotta get moving. The open bar at the big gay awards show waits for no one!

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3) Whats the right frequency for a writers meetup? And by that I just mean drinks, no salon, no feedback group, just the margaritas please.

I love this because there is no right answer. The very best kind of question! Are you an extrovert and like to party? Buddy, you could meet up every night of the week! Should you do that? Probably notbut you could! Are you an introvert who prefers meeting only occasionally? Then you could probably get away with every other month (or even longer). Is this a large groupsay, ten or more? Then youre probably going to have more scheduling and calendar issues. If its just like two or three of you? Then it will be easy to plan and you can make it happen on the fly. Mostly I would say you should go with group consensus. And if theres gonna be margaritas, please make sure to send me an invite!

Okay, Im off to the awards! Join me next time when Ill probably still be hungover from this after party. And please keep sending me your anonymous questions! I truly live for them.

Drink responsibly, Dad

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Are you worried youre the literary asshole? Ask Kristen via email at AskKristen@lithub.com, or anonymously here.

See the article here:

I Want to Call Out My Friend For Using AI in Her Newsletter: Am I the Literary Asshole? - Literary Hub